I just came back from another floating session, my third one in total with my friend Natasha. In comparison to my other floats, this floatation session was unpleasant and frustrating. More of a mental experience unlike the spiritual and body heavy experiences from the previous sessions. For starters, my body was constantly hitting up against the wall which is imperative to the whole "sensory depravation" experience. I found myself constantly touching the wall so that I wouldn't rotate as much and when I would finally let go, I would hit my arm, foot, and head against the wall. I feel that the moments and emotions leading up to the session are partially or perhaps entirely to blame. I was definitely not enthusiastic to go floating the day before and was even considering canceling. I am unsure as to why I felt that way, but I just felt that floating would be awkward this time around. Also, I had a long and an emotional conversation with a friend of mine minutes before starting my session. It also didn't help talking about the events that were bothering me in my life to this friend. If there was one thing I learned from the floating tank today, was that I need to love and trust myself. That I can attract these people who make me feel so awful. Even if I've been unknowingly rude in the past, that still bares no right to have the same done unto me. From the relaxation of tank, I've seen that these words used upon me, these cold, harsh words, made me feel so dreadful if I spoke the same to others who could have felt as I feel now.
